Tuesday, March 18, 2014

Do I Trust Others More than I Trust Myself?

Trust (according to my Google dictionary) is a firm belief in the reliability, truth, ability, or strength of someone or something.

Complicated question. The truth is there are areas where I trust myself completely, and other areas where I still think others know best.

My life has taught me how to trust myself when it comes to relationships.  Whether romantic, platonic or professional - anytime I've felt betrayed or abused there was always 'something' about the person or situation that was off.  I don't know how many times I said  'I knew this would happen'.   I ignored my God-given gut.   I silenced that still small voice, and went on with my bad self into what ultimately would become a mess of a situation.   It wasn't my trust of the person that lured or kept me in a mess. It was the distrust I had in myself.  I've learned though.  The older I get, the less I fall into that  trap.  It is critical for my health and success to have good supportive people around.  I can't afford to make relationship mistakes and hook up with someone who does not have my best interest at heart.  Every single time I have gone against my, well its almost a sixth sense, I have paid the price.    Emotionally, financially, mentally, spiritually.  The truth about people is easier to see then we let on.  I can't afford to pay that price, so I listen...very VERY carefully.

Now there are other areas where I still don't trust myself enough.  When it comes to what I do with my business and or/talents.   I have to stop the second guessing and quiet myself long enough to 'hear' what I am supposed to be doing.  I fight the temptation to think that people automatically know more and have it 'all' figured out.   I love knowledge - I seek it out.  I like being informed and knowledgable.  I always want to make sure I am doing the right thing and sometimes in my quest for doing it right,  I stop trusting what I know and suddenly where I see myself is not good enough.  I have to be careful, or I will take on too much and let my focus wander because someone else's idea was better than mine.

When it comes to relationships, trusting myself has gotten easier.   I have always had a kind of sixth sense when it comes to people. Still, I 've had my share of jobs, so-called friends and business opportunities that were so obviously wrong for me.   Had I just trusted myself enough, I could have avoided  so much conflict and foolishness.  Can I tell you I have learned my lessons!!

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