Wednesday, April 14, 2010

My own little Naomi Campbell...

I have talked alot about my journey through my twin pregnancy with Lauren and Noelle and I know it is heavy stuff.  Heavy to write and heavy to read.  But I have to say, even though my jumping into the deep of my memories has caused my emotions to rise and settle in a very touchable place, I am happy and excited.  Although life is tough, messy, chaotic and somewhat unpredicitable, it is still good and I have learned a multitude of truths that can never be taken away from me. As difficult and painful my experience was, my life is better for it.  In this post I wanted to give my baby Noelle some equal happy time. 

Everyday I wake up and I cannot believe that I have three young kids, am a terrible excuse for a soccer mom and live in the suburbs of Washington, DC.  When I was 21 I thought by time I was in my 40s -I would be living in a loft in New York's Lower East Side, frequenting poetry readings and writing Pulitzer Prize quality books.  Truth be told, I thought this image would have manifested itself by time I was 30.  40 seemed like an impossible age to think about.

At 42 I live in a too small, messy apartment where my days are spent flabbergasted at how tired I am and trying to create order out of my chaos.  My kids are high, high energy, very loud and very talkative. I swear Jon-Jon and Noelle both came out of the womb speaking in full sentences.  Q talks less, but when he starts, it is nothing short of painful.  My fascination with my kids rotates.  This week I am on a Noelle kick.  She simultaneously fascinates and cracks me up.

Noelle is all girl.  Her favorite colors are pink and purple and she relays this information to me on a daily basis. After I do her hair  - she runs to look in the mirror and offers me a critique.  Noelle has carried a purse religiously since she was one.  At the ripe old age of three she is afflicted with the dreaded female disease...shoe addiction!  Especially ones that are bedazzaled and sparkly. 

 I've spoken with those moms who are way more enlightened than I  - who express concern over their daughters fixation with pink and all things princess-ey.  They do not want their daughters to fall into some sort of gender stereotype.  Frankly, I do not worry about Noelle's hyper girlness. It doesn't bother me that she uses my sleep mask as a bra, is meticulous about the cleanliness of her hands, or that she is superior to me in her organization skills and neatness.  I do not worry about it because she is currently expressing herself as she sees herself right now.  It is not my job to dictate to her what level of girly-ness is appropriate.  My job is to guide her into herself.  And if I am to take that job seriously, I do not want to start, at her tender age of three, to communicate to her (on any level) that there is something wrong about who she is.  Today she wants to be pink, fluffy and tutu-ish.  She is experimenting with who she is, and the process of elimination could be the fastest way to get there.  At five she may be a full-blown tom-boy outfitted with skinned knees and a dirty mouth. 

The only thing I worry about with Noelle is making sure she doesn't have the Naomi Campbell syndrome. She keeps knocking her brothers upside the head with a variety of toys and household items. One of which was a pink, plastic barbie cell-phone.  I catch her often before she strikes them with a balled fist (it looks more like she is giving them the thumbs up).  Last week, her oldest brother Jon -Jon informed me that Noelle said that he and Q were "idiots".  At church no less!  So she was reprimanded sternly and sent to apologize immediately.  The next day she accused them of being, "punks".  This time I told Jon-Jon and Q to stop teaching her those words.  Jon smilied sheepishly, so I knew I was on the right track. 

Honestly, her brothers adore her. For the most part Noelle is kind, very generous, loving and extremely affectionate. She mothers and babies them the best way she knows how, and works very hard to keep them on the straight and narrow.  She follows their every move, especially on the playground, so I have to constantly take her off mile high monkey bars, and keep her from climbing  the outside of the tube slides.  She's tough and I love it.  She's bossy and it makes me smile, except when she demands that I leave what I am doing and get her toilet paper for her.  When I refuse, she screams, "Mommy - I want YOU to get my toilet paper for meeee!"  Sigh...

What amuses me and makes me most proud is the way she speaks.  She has an advanced vocabularly, which is not unusal for kids in our family.  But it's not necessarily the words she chooses, its how she chooses to use them.  "Mommy are these sneakers on the right feet...or NO?"  "Mommy, I would like some chicken nuggets...also."  And my favorite is from last night at the dinner table when Jon was telling a story, Noelle looked up from picking the corn out of her cornbread, pointed to herself and asked,  "Was Me there?" That's when I remembered Noelle is 3 and not 17. I just wish she would stay out of my makeup.


  1. Oh my goodness. Sweetness. And I wouldn't worry about the sleep mask/bra thing - my two year old (boy) likes to wear my bra around the house too, and both boys constantly want me to do their hair like mine ;).

    Really love your blog, CJ!

    Peryl @ parenting ad absurdum

  2. Thanks Peryl,

    Great moments aren't they! The bra fascination is hysterical.

  3. Your children are adorable! The eye mask as a bra is too funny. I know that I am missing these wonderfully girl moments by having three boys but I wouldn't trade them in for the world.

    They too are extremely noisy and I long for piece and quiet and yet, when it comes, I get very lonely for the noise.

    Worried about empty nest syndrome and it is 8 years down the road!

  4. My first two were boys, and there was something great about being the only woman. I thought I was destined to mother boys...and then came Noelle. Not just a girl, but a girly girl. As much as I like to express my womaness, the last thing that I am is girly!

  5. Your bebes are GORgeous!! Enjoy enjoy ... as a mom of 4 (26, 21, 16 and 9) I know how quickly these moments pass by! I'm following you from MBC!!